I’m back!

Hi guys… Sorry that I haven’t posted in a while. Since September. The last few months have been really rough. I couldn’t bring myself to the computer to type anymore and I was really depressed. I’ll tell you why.

The new school year was going okay, except for the egging, it was alright… I really couldn’t complain.

But when I would come home and I would have to make clothes and bonnets and hats for the store Joseph and I own, The Wagon Wheel. It was my second job. I would rush home from school just to make sure I would finish everything. Also, people would give me requests to make stuff for them that they needed on my Etsy store. So I wanted to keep up with those too. On top of that, I had my wifely (is that word?) duties I needed to take care of like making supper, cleaning dishes, and doing laundry, as well as taking care of Joey Jr. I felt like I never got to spend a lot of time with Joey anymore too, and I didn’t want to be “that parent.”

After about three weeks of that routine I was very exhausted. I think Joseph noticed something was wrong, but I didn’t say anything to him about it. Finally on a Saturday night I just broke down and told him everything. I told him how miserable I was. He said I should have told him and how I didn’t have to keep making stuff for TWW if I didn’t want to. I told him how I was doing both jobs halfway. I told him how I missed being home with Joey. I cried for about an hour and he held me. He told my that I needed to choose which job I wanted to quit, and he told me to be honest and that he wouldn’t be hurt if I chose my teaching job more than making stuff for our store. He said that he could always find someone else to make things to sell.

I called in sick that next Monday and cried all day, trying to decide what I wanted to do. Sam came over to comfort me, but I was mostly unresponsive. I didn’t know what to do.

Well, that night I made my decision.

I was going to quit my job at Indian West Amish School.

That next morning I called my boss and said I was quitting. I told Miss Yoder, my aide, and she said she would happily take my job.

Those last two weeks I spent loving every moment of my job. Even when I had to give some kids time out. I tried to be loving about it.

I told my kids the last week that the coming Friday would be my last day as their teacher. Some of them were really sad, which made me smile because I knew I would be missed. On that last Friday, we had fun all day and I didn’t give them any lessons at all. I ordered pizza for them and we played games. They also showered me with gifts…. It was a bittersweet day. It was bitter that it was my last day, but sweet because I got to smile and laugh with all of my kids. They are my whole world and I love them so much. Even Billy who was always out to get me.

When it came to be the end of the day, I stood by the door and gave each child a hug as they walked out. I also gave each child a cookie I made and a personal note from me as my way of saying goodbye.

I was crying the whole time.

I was alright for the first month at home without my teaching job. I mean, I couldn’t complain. I got to stay home with my son in our pajamas each day. And I was starting to catch up on all of my crocheting, knitting, and sewing orders from both online and at TWW. I kept thinking I needed to update you guys, but I thought that if I thought too much about my old job I would break down again.

Well, even though I was getting all of my things done, I realized I was still very depressed on the inside. I missed seeing the kids. I missed being a teacher. That was when I started to get depressed and I definitely didn’t touch the computer for a few months. I was so sad. I still am, but I don’t regret quitting. I always knew it would have to happen sometime, but I just didn’t want to think about it.

Well, here I am. I figured that I had waited long enough to tell you where I was those months.

My Christmas was very nice and I got a lot of things that I had been wanting. Joseph surprised me with a new sewing machine and some very pretty fabric that Sam just HAD to have picked out for him. Joseph is very indecisive about that kind of stuff. I can’t see him standing in the fabric store for 45 minutes trying to decide what I would like and what I wouldn’t like. So he probably just sent Sam to do it. They won’t admit anything though!

Oh, and Joey received a lot of toys too. He is one happy boy. By the way, he’s turning one on January 13, 2013. I can’t believe it.

How was everyone else’s Christmases?

 

 

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